No, not you… the person who is reading this.

I’m talking to the ‘blog.

Pure Rock Fury, as a website, is done, dead, kaput, bitmish, fucked.

We don’t post frequently enough for this site to draw any traffic… or for it to be of any interest to anybody at all, really.

As such, I will personally stop posting shit here; I’m sure Gregg will, as well.

I will, however, put any music-related posts up on the Head from now on. I already started this practice with my review of the latest Clutch show.

As for Gregg, check his site for any updates.

-Gary

In case you were wondering… the show is sold out.

I have a ticket, though.
So does my wife.
So does Gregg.
So does his wife.
So does Chris.
So does Mark.
So does Mike.
So does Andrij.

And, obviously, a shitload more people.

Jealous?

If you’re not going… you should be, bitches.

A joint review via IM.

Gary: I am finding that the NIN is quickly falling out of rotation.
Gary: I am not impressed.
Gregg: It’s just not that good.
Gregg: Dystopian futures are hokey, anyway.

That’s it.
Five.
Don’t waste your time.

A quick review. Not a single complete sentence.

Southern stoner rock.
Hard rock, not quite metal.
Deep, muddy mix.
Lack of range.
Riff-a-riffic.
Guitars that swagger.
Begs to be a little dirtier.
Should have been faster.
Best tracks: Valor, Open Fire

Six.

I will purposefully avoid applying this album’s title to any aspect of the band in question, and its previous release (which I already bitched about). It’s just too goddamned easy, and doesn’t even begin to approach clever. I just wish others who post reviews online had the same self-respect.

1. Resurrection – Great driving drums. I especially like the guitar riff used to round out the chorus. This is quite the anger-filled song, with the lyrics aimed squarely at Roadrunner (their former label). The breakdown at the end is completely unnecessary.

2. Pleasure in Pain – This song is the first where they use crazy Swedish-metal sounding harmonizing in the vocals. Not a bad tune overall, but nothing outstanding.

3. Worthless – Old-school thrash-metal riffs in this one; if you ignore the chorus, you could be forgiven for thinking it came off a late eighties thrash album. Same goes for the lead solo. That said, the chorus ruins it for me.

4. Six – Finally, some variety. It starts off way different than the other three; slower, and not trying too hard. Really good use of the “acoustic” guitar in the intro. Then–blam–back to the script, only more relentless… until… yet another unnecessarily slow breakdown-come-chorus. Hatebreed? Table for four? Your table’s ready. It’s a shame, because there are parts of this song that outright motherfuckin’ rock.

5. No Reason to Live – Another slow start followed by some Fear Factory-esque naked snare and distorted bass. After that, there’s no reason to listen. You’ve already heard this song (see above).

6. Killing the Beast – Just keep saying the title of the song over and over in your head. There. You wrote the same song as Chimaira. Where’s your royalty check?

7. The Flame – Nice chunky riffs at the beginning. On the surface, this sounds like a pretty tough song; its lyrics are brutal. Some pretty cool guitar shit in there, too. Then at the end, you realize it’s about a guy kidtouching on his daughter, then killing her. What the fuck? Okay, so they wrote a Slipknot song… whatever.

8. End It All – This one’s a little more riffy than all the others, and brings back the crazy harmonizing. It actually works in this song, which is the best on the album. It’s definitely a keeper. Should have ended “it all” (read: the album) with this one; go out on a high note you bitter, self-loathing motherfuckers.

9. Black Heart – This song could very well be mistaken for a Ministry rip-off. Except for the limp guitar solos and lack of… yup… heart (whatever the color).

10. Needle – Heavy and sound-thick as elephant shit. Good tempo change-ups. A great driving song ‘cuz the motherfuckers tear shit up at the end. Yeah, I know what you’re thinking… it’s a Slipknot track! True, but also the 2nd best song on the album. p.s. It’s about heroin.

11. Empire – An anthem to martyrdom, replete with some “churchy” choir-ish touches and killer double-kicks. Not a bad song if you ignore the stupid fucking lyrics.

All of the songs sound the same. The vocals are overall gritty and dry-throated, but still intelligible. Then there’s that whole “I’m the stereotypical (pick one) goth/emo/suicidal/misunderstood/dope-fiend teenager” bullshit behind all the lyrics. I hate everyone and everything because I consider myself worthless because my mean old daddy beat that concept of worthlessness indelibly into my semi-functioning brain, whereas the brain damage was either genetically or beat-down induced.

Whatever.

It’s just this type of lyrical tripe that bolsters the paranoid delusions of crazy-as-fuck, self-perceived “outcasts” with access to daddy’s gun cabinet. You know what I’m talking about.

The guys had a chance to redeem themselves. And, to a certain extent, they did so.

But Jesus Fucking Christ… lay off the personal negative shit and just rock the fuck out, why don’t ya’? You could have. You should have. You didn’t; you ruined it with bullshit words.

The music alone gets a six; a bit more variety would’ve helped. The lyrics get a four when I’m in a good mood and willing to forgive abject idiocy. That there’s what we call a five here at the Fury.

-Gary

Down
Monday, April 2, 2007 at 7:30pm
930 Club

Stone Sour
Tuesday, April 10, 2007 at 7:00pm
Ram’s Head Live
Jagermeister Music Tour feat. Stone Sour w/ Lacuna Coil, Shadows Fall, Unbroken

Cannibal Corpse
Friday, April 27, 2007 at 6:00pm
Sonar
w/ The Red Chord, Job for a Cowboy, Psyopus

Static-X
Saturday, April 28, 2007 at 10:00pm (late show)
930 Club
w/ Otep, 2Cents

Devildriver & Unearth
Sunday, April 29, 2007 at 7:30pm
Sonar
Dimmu Borgir headline, Kataklysm also supports

As Blood Runs Black
Sunday, April 29, 2007 at 2:30pm (all day shows)
Jaxx
w/ Bury Your Dead, Animosity, Suicide Silence, Stick to Your Guns, The Faceless, Beneath the Massacre, Since the Flood

Type O Negative
Sunday, May 6, 2007 at 7:00pm
Sonar
w/ Celtic Frost, Brand New Sin

Bullet For My Valentine & All That Remains
Monday, May 7, 2007 at 6:00pm
Ram’s Head Live
w/ Escape the Fate, The Confession

Clutch
Friday, May 11, 2007 at 9:00pm
930 Club
w/ The Bellrays, Backyard Tire Fire

Mastodon
Wednesday, May 23, 2007 at 6:00pm
Sonar
w/ Against Me, Cursive, These Arms are Snakes

Previous ponderings prove pathetically pointless.

I suppose it’s safe to say there will not be a Clutch show anywhere near the D.C. area tonight. My previous statement: “Recher Theater doesn’t have a show on the 22nd,” has been struck down by the powers that be. Tonight, Stupid Hero, Hold Fast Young Pilot, Scarlet Ransom, and Miseuphoria (all bands I’ve never heard of) are playing Recher.

The Clutch website still states “TBD” for a show tonight… but at this point who fuckin’ cares where they’re playing ‘cuz it ain’t within driving distance for us.

But, if you’re looking for a review of their new album From Beale Street to Oblivion, check my previous post, eh?
-Gary

First of all, I must give thanks to [insert the name of your favorite omniscient being here], because I was lucky enough to get an advance copy. All that aside: Here’s my review of the new Clutch album From Beale Street to Oblivion.

This is album is all Clutch, all the time.

It’s not the Clutch you’ve heard, but it’s the Clutch you always thought you’d hear… the Clutch you always expected would come along.

Remember when you first heard Blast Tyrant? It was different from Pure Rock Fury, wasn’t it? It was a little funkier, a little less harsh, but it was still “Clutch”.

Remember when you first heard Robot Hive/Exodus? It was different from Blast Tyrant, wasn’t it? It was deep and chunky… but it was a little deeper, a little chunkier, and a little more groovy (not in the hippy way), but it was still “Clutch”.

At times, this album lopes along at a slower pace. The guitar sound is mellower–still dirty–but the sharper edges have been smoothed. It’s the mix; analog tape, bitches. That alone gives it an all-around thicker sound. Yet there are plenty of catchy hooks, organ solos, and–yes, the rumors are true–a little hard-monica action.

As any Clutch fan would expect, Neil Fallon’s trademark vocals are impeccable, and his words speak truth.

But, in all honesty, I wasn’t immediately sold on the album the very first time I listened to it.

It doesn’t have an “Impetus”. It isn’t “Pure Rock Fury”. “A Shogun Named Marcus” will not be found on this album. It’s just as different as their previous releases have been when compared to their immediate predecessors.

Which means: It’s different, but not at all unexpected. Quite the contrary: The “expected” thing about this album is that it fucking rocks.

Listen to it twice, maybe three times, and you’ll be asking for more Clutch-flavored Kool-aid.

It gets the Crushing Nine.

You can’t stop progress.

-Gary

Clutch will kick off their Spring 2007 U.S. tour at the 9:30 club in D.C. on Friday, May 11th at 9:00pm. Tickets are $25, and are on sale now through TicketBastard. Yup, you’ll pay another $6 per ticket in “service charges” which is the industry term used instead of “cornholing”.

Purely speculative: There remains an open date on the band’s current tour. They’re playing in upstate New York next Wednesday, March 21st, and then at The Norva in Norfolk next Friday the 23rd. On their tour schedule, next Thursday the 22nd still says “TBA”.

So that leads me to believe they’re going to be taking the stage somewhere that night… but where? Logic dictates they’ll be somewhere between NY and Norfolk. Could it be Philly? Might they grace us in the D.C. area with a last-minute announcement? Maybe it’s Baltimore, which wouldn’t be too much of a stretch, since they’re from Maryland and all.

It won’t be the 9:30 – they’ve got a show that night.
It won’t be Sonar – Pete Yorn instead.
It won’t be the Rams Head – sold out Breaking Benjamin gig.

Hrm… Recher Theater doesn’t have a show on the 22nd…
-Gary

Wanna’ know what’s next here on The Fury?

Pre-release reviews of the new Clutch album, “From Beale Street to Oblivion” from Gary, Gregg, and hopefully Paul… along with news of a D.C. tour date (which you’ve already learned if you subscribe to the Feeds of Fury).

Also, an honest review of the new Chimaira release, “Resurrection”.

I might find time to do a write-up for last year’s Threat Signal… but I figure I’m pretty late to the party on that one…

-Gary